secrets all out
this post may be something that most of you guys not had expected to come out from me. but i need to let it go. before it gets mouldy deep down beneath me. so if you are here just to make everything worse. just back off. thanks.before i even start with anything. all this stuff is purely sincerely from a freaking 16 year old kid.
you know sometimes when adult says they understands you and you just feel that they arent really saying what they are saying. and sometimes adults act in a way that might somehow or rather hurt us? i`ve been keeping this all along. thinking that if i had tell the whole world bout it, everyone including me, will suffer. and as days goes by, it just keeps biting me deeply. the word SEX is something that all you guys out there can make a whole lot of joke bout it. but to me, its a major hurtful thing. jus think bout it. some couple having sex just right beside you. and there isnt anyone else in the room. its a terrible experience for me. i would rather jump off the highest building in the world than to be in the scenario. they done something for the sake of their pleasureness rather then take into account that i was in the room too. i mean if you guys wanted to do it, get it done somewhere i wont be able to see or hear. its fucking stupid to get it done when someone is there to observe the entire experiment right?! and one more thing. when i was i the midst of trying to get out of the situation, there isnt anyone i could depend onto. i was there all alone. cuddling myself. comforting myself. saying that everything is soon gonna be over. but it didnt right. when i was there for you. taking care of you when ure sick. calling to say if you need anything. everything. but when i jus ask a simple favour from you. you give a whole lot of excuses. jus say that you love her than me. i hate you dude. well, to be as honest as i can be. i hate all of you. saying that you love me. saying that you understand me. saying that you cared bout me. but the truth is you guys dont. if you guys have had, all these things shouldn`t have happen. well, thanks for everything. thanks for all these dramas. thanks for letting me know what family is. thanks for letting me know that i could not depend on anyone. just a big big thank you. for. everything.
PS: to all the outsiders, if ure gonna say that i should sit down and talk things out with whomever it may concern, i think you should just forget bout it.
-you know i hate you-
On Sunday, August 9, 2009 at 5:36 AM
pooooop!
first thing first, got my result today. pretty heartbreaking. lose a freaking 0.1 mark to pass my mob. i feel damn pathetic. but wads done is done, rite H? to spur me on, H brought me along to play hockey with his two of his other frens. and i think we even broke most of the rules of a true hockey friendly game. hahha. but thats not all. ltr part of the day, im off to bh. i kinda miss my frens there. especially my dear ones. met up with ex mates. and found out dat de -dents are pretty messed up than my batch. so since the atmosphere is pretty tensed, i, whom gotten back my usual self, went ard supping and upskirting with my hot pink lady. she is such a companion! and a lovable one too! oh yeah, i totally forgot bout this. jasmin brought along eugene! syazwan needs a crutches! beatrice has a size A! steph koh perms her hair!and jia yean is.. uhmm.. tall as ever! XD the breeze in bh reminds me of the sweat tears fun and laughter i had in bh once. such an awesome feeling. when we move on wit our life, we`ll found out how beautiful life has been for us. as H always sings.. ALWAYS LOOK ON THE BRIGHT SIDE OF LIFE DUDUDUDUDUDUDUDU... while imagining himself singing on a stage with an electric guitar on his hands. hes so adorable. and the best part is he lend me his laptop to write this post while he`s driving me to somewhere he wont even tell me ): hes such a... what shall i name it.. dude?~you know i love you~
On Friday, July 31, 2009 at 5:08 AM
bargains!
so today was kinda spent shopping for super duper cheap stuffs. our first pit was the salvation army. it has freaking lots of cute stuffs at such a cheap price. from the old to the very young ones. this stores covers most of the needs for different types of generation. but due to lack of the goods that we kinda want, so we just went off with 2 belts and 5 shades. PS: THE SHADES ARE SO THE RETRO! so we hop into the bus and off to chinatown. it got lots of stuffs too but it isnt that cheap. so we only bought magnetic bangles. overall it was quite fun. cos almost every minute our dear mrs. nigel barker aka tracie needs to shoot the different models of the day. and the shots were really fantastic. PS: THE BARTENDER LOOK-ALIKE LOOKS SO FREAKING HOT! tyra would definitely had a hard time choosing which to represent singapore. cos everybody is really potential. you should really take a closer look at the pics once our photographer uploads it. till then!~you know i love you~
Labels: singapore next top model
On Friday, July 10, 2009 at 4:11 AM
so yesterday
i was too tired to wrote in ytd night. so yeah. firstly, went for class outing at sentosa. around 22 souls came by. though this ppl can make a lion dance troupe. it isnt as exciting as it seems. but i do agree that i did have fun. but others. im not that sure. so, S and E decided to walk off earlier and window-shop at vivo instead. since LIL A has no other better options to choose from. she decides to tag along. they had fun camwhoring almost everywhere. they were like three lil kids. making a nuisance at every single place. well, to be exact, a cute nuisance. unfortunately, LIL A had to leave by afternoon. so sadly, she takes off to her aunts makan place. tagging along was her bestfriend. whom kinda became a pitiful one when he was asked to help in the kitchen. it was an adorable torturous. LIL A just cant stop laughing, looking at how mighty can her fren be, while she patiently waits for patrons. that was kinda how the story ended. she got a great time sleeping on her cosy bed. with so many pillows around that can seem to suffocate her. but what really matters is that shes happy to have spend her day quite uhmm.. meaningfully. hahas(:~you know i love you~
Labels: bedtime story
at 3:51 AM
officially closed
as all of us are aware. our king pop has just passed away. but this doesnt make his fan`s spirit fade away. i was watching the farewell for MJ yesterday night. its really touching. when he was around. i wasnt even aware for his songs. or even movies. thats how bad i am. ironically, i like him. he`s like a perfectionist in almost everything. though he suffered from different setbacks in his life. it doesnt really fall him apart. even as a teeny-weeny fan of him, i felt a sense of lost. its like. is there gonna be anybody that is gonna shape the world like he did? but im sure his family members suffers the greatest cut. as a malay saying goes, berat mata memandang, berat lagi bahu yang memikul. oh well, im sure he is.. blessed(:
RIP MJ<3
~you know i love you~
On Tuesday, July 7, 2009 at 7:55 PM
supped!
its been long. time passes. and now my exams are totally over! happy to a certain extent. being treated to popeyes. watching movies. chilling out. and have a cosy cosy night on the bed. my body are gettin lazy over time. worse than pigs. anyways, jus the night before. i was wondering. is the world really gonna end soon? i mean like very soon? i cant help thinking it that way. people around me are like bugging me with it. you know. even as a 16 year old kid. im just as bad as the old ones who commit lots of mistakes in this world. though we offer our apology. does that makes us as pure like a new born babies? it doent really matter whether i go to hell or heaven. im just worried i cant see Him. i dont really mind my life being taken rite now. though i know i got plenty of stuffs that i would like to do with my life here on earth. but its better then doing more sinful stuffs. you may/may not agree with me. but im just stating whats on my mind right now. now the question is are you?~you know i love you~
at 12:53 AM
MOB is dead and gone!
yayayay! mob is over. the paper is okay-okay la. not so hard; not so difficult. haha(: meet up wit old frens. its been some time since i saw them.still as cheerful; as happening as before. haha! decides to play comp first before continue studying. checking mails and all that kind of stuff. just laid back and relax. you know. i really dun feel a thing for the promos. not even a pinch. so is this a good or bad sign? haha.till then, keep wondering for me yeaps.-you know i love you-
On Sunday, June 28, 2009 at 11:20 PM
About Me
as a matter of fact this is a story of a young virgo girl that has just discovered the eleventh wonders of the world. wanna know more?? seems tempting??.... ...treat me to a lollipop! [:Shout out
By title
secrets all out
pooooop!
bargains!
so yesterday
officially closed
supped!
MOB is dead and gone!